Ádám Bodor
The Smell of Prison
Responses to Zsófia Balla
(Extracts)
Part 1
As for borderlands, it is of course no accident that in many of my stories
the action is laid in just such regions. The frontier and its immediate environs
are always more exciting than the interior of a country. The frontier zone
is a strange, magical place, the mysterious centre of risk and adventure,
where the landscape itself, and every movement in it, is full of tension.
In the eastern end of Europe this generally meant a region sealed off with
barriers and barbed wire, with menacing watchtowers looming over water-filled
ditches, where even a high-flying bird was seen as a privileged insider. There
was no free passage across these borders; ordinary mortals couldn't even go
near them. And residents close by were people whose very thoughts were defined
to an absurd extent by an awareness of where they lived. For here it often
happens that arbitrarily redrawn borders divide settlements so that one can
peer into another country from morning to night. At times, a relatively narrow
river constitutes the border, like the Tisza in Máramaros (Maramures¸), and
members of the same family living on opposite banks are able to holler across
the river-and they would, too, if they weren't afraid they'd be shot at.
Although these borders separate people-relatives, friends-and cut across historically
unified areas, they are also places of subtle emanations and osmosis, where
two cultures and mentalities rub against, and also penetrate, each other.
To repeat, then: it is surely no accident that the setting of my stories is
often an imagined border region, and that I think mostly in terms of living
conditions in these areas. A few decades ago, in my youth, Transylvania itself
was in a sense a borderland. And this is where I had the good fortune to grow
up and spend a large part of my life; it was the scene of all my formative
experiences.
Exactly what sort of borderland was the Transylvania of your youth?
The three dominant cultures of Transylvania-Hungarian, Romanian and German-have
always existed apart from one another. Different in dress, in the foods they
ate and the homes they built, the people belonging to these three cultures
were set apart by even deeper, more sensitive divisions. Three completely
unrelated nations lived side by side in the same general area, to say nothing
of smaller nationalities and denominations, all of which made this land unusually
colourful and multifaceted. If you set out from Kolozsvár (Cluj) in almost
any direction, you became aware of this variety, were struck by the differences.
You had Armenian Szamosújvár (Gherla), Hungarian Kalotaszeg, and the densely
Romanian Mot, region. Though geographically and historically not a part of
Transylvania, even Nagyvárad (Oradea), the most attractively urban of the
Hungarian settlements, could be considered a Transylvanian city. A little
farther away, in the Banat, there was open and cosmopolitan Temesvár (Timis¸oara),
a window to the West; and on the way back, in the crescent of the southern
Carpathians, Nagyszeben (Sibiu-Hermannstadt) and Brassó (Bras¸ov-Kronstadt),
with their well-ordered, patrician world, brought a great European culture
right to our doorstep. In the north, Nagybánya (Baia Mare) still had the air
of an old German mining town, while Máramarossziget (Sighet) with its Galician
connections and mysterious lights evoked an almost Chagallian world. And in
the centre of Transylvania, like a huge enclave, stood the Sziget Mountains,
the fairyland-like Mot, region. Whether the different nationalities lived
in one solid block or right next to one another, intermingled, the tensions
hidden under the surface could hardly be felt in daily life. They coexisted,
but as I said, the three major nationalities did not have much to do with
one another. All of Transylvania was crisscrossed by walls or invisible demarcation
lines. When viewed optimistically, and discounting the imposed communist institutions,
the historical reality several decades ago still had something positive to
offer. It may seem like mere illusion today, but at the time we thought that
this may yet become a land of relative peace and tolerance; that the post-war
world may bring some sort of balance and stability to the region. And even
if the status quo would not change, our chances for remaining in place would
not diminish.
In the nineteen-sixties the young people of Kolozsvár filled the promenade.
The four sides of King Matthias Square were frequented by different social
groups, and the western and southern sides, along Deák Ferenc Street all the
way to the Romanian Opera, belonged to the students. Here you could hear Hungarian,
Romanian as well as German being spoken. The same was true of the marketplace,
the shops, and the lobbies of concert halls. Depending on their origins, young
people spoke a different language, dressed differently, the colour of their
hair, even their smell was different. This admixture, aside from being terribly
exciting and enriching, was seen as the most natural thing in the world-it
didn't seem to bother anyone. It stemmed from the basic character of the place,
we thought then; it was part of our identity.
In Transylvania, situated as it is on the fringes of Europe, something else
could be felt. At times, the icy winds of the eastern steppes blew through
the Carpathian mountain passes, and not infrequently we felt the numbing cold
of the realm beyond the Arctic Circle. Each region of the land had its own
complexion, and there were places where the dreariest aspects of Eastern Europe,
its defencelessness, seediness, and grinding poverty, became ominously visible.
They signaled the beginnings of deteriorating conditions which, in a more
advanced stage of decline, make a place ripe for dictatorship.
For me, birthplace conjures up the image of a culturally multifarious, physically
quite beautiful yet melancholy land. This image dominates my thinking and
memory to this day; it remains a model from which I can never break away.
I cannot imagine a setting for a story that is not a place inhabited by people
of different origins, where Hungarians are not in the majority. There are
those who take this ill of me, saying that I populate Transylvania with every
race under the sun. But all I really want to do is get away from an idyllic
picture that has precious little to do with what the term native land means
to my generation. I feel that even the geographical coordinates are unfavourable
here to wisdom and good cheer. Even the configurations of the terrain determine
to some extent the in-habitants' temperament and moral bearing. They may sing
its praises, but frankly, I think there is something not quite right with
this whole Carpathian basin, at least with the flatter stretches of land.
The scattered farmsteads dotting the landscape may exude a cozy warmth, but
the piercing winds rising from time to time in the plains bring with them
a bleakness, an apathy.
For this, before I had a chance to complete my secondary
education, I was barred from every high school in the country. Thus, it didn't
take great political acumen on my part, or an inner crisis and disillusionment,
to develop subversive views. The fact is I had no opportunity to break out
of the situation I was in. So I accepted my condition as one dealt by fate,
and I also accepted the reasons for the raw deal. For I did indeed consider
myself a "class enemy" and an enemy of the new social order. The political
verdict spared me for a liftetime from having to playact. I didn't have to
feign loyalty, because my political stand was out in the open. As a result,
I felt tremendously liberated. Even the Securitate henchmen, I felt, showed
me a bit of respect. I found that these people had utter contempt for anyone
who was in cahoots with them. At least I never had to make a secret of where
I belonged.
How exactly did you plan to overthrow the regime and seize power?
We suspected from the beginning that we wouldn't be able to carry this out
peacefully. At the start, our arsenal consisted of a razor-sharp bayonet and
a small-caliber revolver with six slugs. This seemed alarmingly little, but
we thought that sooner or later we'd become stronger, even financially, and
then somehow-nothing seemed impossible to us-we would add to our stock of
weapons. We couldn't seriously count on the Romanian People's Army, or some
crack unit in the armed forces, to join our side, though this would have made
things considerably easier. The means of the takeover needed further looking
into. One thing was fairly clear: although our organisation was not anti-Romanian
per se, we, being Hungarian, did envisage the future of the region in terms
of an independent Transylvania with sound, democratic institutions-under our
leadership, of course. As for actual positions in the new government, I had
my heart set on the post of foreign minister. Even as a novice in these things,
I sort of knew that if you are in the foreign service, you get to travel a
lot. There'd be exciting, colourful, new places, receptions, romantic adventures...
And, of course, the fate of the country to worry about. Since our organization
faced an oppressive, despotic regime, we borrowed that regime's strategy in
some things, and at first expected to achieve our ultimate goals-such is the
nature of revolutions-through dictatorial means. No question about it: the
introduction of a long-awaited democratic system would have relied, even in
our scenario, on a certain amount of violence. If I remember correctly, when
it came to the question of Transylvanian autonomy, it didn't even occur to
us to hold a referendum on the issue. So there were, especially in the beginning,
a number of unanswered questions, ill-contrived plans-problems, in short,
that still needed to be worked out on the practical as well as theoretical
end. But before we had a chance to map out our strategy, we were arrested.
So later on, on the autonomy question at least, we didn't get into trouble
with the majority, Romanian-speaking population.
According to the largest Hungarian encyclopćdia, the majority population
of Transylvania, already in 1911, was ethnic Romanian.
Actually, this was true as early as 1700. When, later in life, I worked as
an archivist, I often came across official figures from that period, according
to which the ratio of Romanian inhabitants within the overall population of
Transylvania (excluding the Banat and the so-called Partium) surpassed that
of the Hungarian and German populations combined. Over the course of time,
it might have been a good idea to reflect on this-after all, we are talking
about the 1700s; the Treaty of Trianon was still two hundred years away.
In any case, there may have been some friction with the Romanian elite over
the actual running of the government and the distribution of posts. Nevertheless,
we were of the opinion then that a genuine partnership was no illusion; in
the interest of common goals, we would not have been ungenerous, and would
have been perfectly willing to accept ministerial posts and other high offices
in proportion to our numbers.
I should add that we also had more attainable, immediate objectives. For example,
we wanted to blow up the electric power lines running through the Bükk Forest.
Come to think of it, this was no mere fantasy. Had we succeeded, you and I
would probably never have met, and my unmarked grave could never be located.
As it happened, we got only as far as producing incendiary leaflets-if we
disregard minor operations and exercises. One of these occurred one dark night
when, in preparation for the plot I mentioned to blow up power lines, we broke
into the chemistry lab of our beloved school, the erstwhile Calvinist Kollégium.
We needed a small amount of nitroglycerin, which we were going to mix with
silicon. But unfortunately, we didn't find a drop of the indispensable fluid.
Not wanting to leave empty-handed, we borrowed some sulphuric acid and poured
it on the statue of Lenin that stood near the main entrance. We didn't get
much sleep that night; early next morning we had to be back in school, in
time for class.
The police didn't find out?
The security police appeared on the scene that very day, and began a feverish
investigation. I must say there was a great flurry of activity. But we weren't
all that worried, since we had carried out the break-in very carefully. In
accordance with the rules of a clandestine operation, we left no fingerprints-we
had been careful enough to wear gloves. There were no footprints either, because
old man David, the school janitor, woke up very early, as always, and cleaned
the floor with sawdust soaked in kerosene. The police dogs had to slink away
with downcast eyes and tails between their legs. So, though we found no nitroglycerin,
we could proudly consider the operation a successful trial run.
Getting even with certain individuals was part of our ambitious plans. From
the inception of our conspiracy, we kept a blacklist, which got longer and
longer. It would be useful, we decided, to get rid of a few potential enemies
and other unsavoury characters. We had a particularly low opinion of activists
in the Communist youth organisation; we wanted to eliminate a certain Comrade
Nagy and a Comrade Barkas even before seizing the reins of power. With snake
poison, no less. I don't know if a refined literary type like yourself is
familiar with the name of Edgar Wallace; if you have ever read any of his
crime stories. He is an excellent writer; we got the idea from him. If I remember
correctly, Four Just Men is the title of the Wallace novel that served as
the inspiration. Not long ago, I was on a train travelling from Brussels to
Cologne, and an attractive young lady sat across the aisle in the compartment.
I was quite pleased-my heart gave a leap, in fact-when I noticed that she
was reading this excellent work. Apparently, in that part of the world, Wallace
has not gone out of fashion. Anyhow, the procedure was as follows: the venom
was frozen into a tiny rod, inserted into a cigarette holder with a spring
inside, and released toward the victim at the right moment. It had to be aimed
at a body part where the skin was the thinnest: the neck area, the eyelids,
the open mouth, et cetera. The murder weapon itself dissolved and vanished,
leaving only two tiny, unnoticeable pinpricks on the skin. Assembling such
a weapon no doubt took a certain amount of technical sophistication. For one
thing, household freezers were not yet in use in those days-in Kolozsvár,
icemen still made their rounds. But we had faith in our resourcefulness, and
figured that with a little diligence and perhaps an engineer's help, the lethal
weapon could be produced. One bright, sunny day, I proposed that we take a
hike to Saint John's Well and have a good look around. I had the boys believe
that the place was swarming with vipers.
We used to have our Sunday afternoon outings there.
Then you must know that the Valley of Saint John's Well is a picturesque,
subalpine spot, with beautiful, purple-blue woodland and a bare hillside at
the narrow valley entrance. We learned in natural science class that vipers
love these dry, rocky, loose-soiled, sun-drenched slopes. And sure enough,
we found numerous little holes, which could very well have been vipers' nests,
but unfortunately, we didn't come upon a single viper. Although we kept stumbling
around on that slope till sunset, holding forked branches in our hands, the
kind used to catch snakes, which you did by pinning their heads to the ground.
But this didn't happen. Comrade Barkas could count his blessings.
Finally, a meek-looking, sad-faced officer, Lieutenant Jusca,
who had been silent until now, stepped up to me and asked me to follow him.
He'll be conducting my interrogation, he said. Once we were in his office,
he invited me to sit down. It was clear that he felt funny about going through
with this; he couldn't act the part of the stern interrogator. What made him
most uncomfortable, I thought, was that he had to communicate just how formidable
the power he represented was. He wasn't rattled when in answer to his question,
did I know why I was here, I said I hadn't the foggiest, and added that for
days I'd been searching for an answer to this question myself. Instead of
literally turning the table on me at this point, which I might have expected
him to do, he repeated, rather sadly, what I had already been told by the
others: that I was accused of being part of an anti-state conspiracy, and
it was time to tell him more about the activities of the organisation known
as the Illegal Anti-Communist League, IACL for short.
It was the first time I heard an outsider use the acronym. I was crushed and
just stared blankly ahead. Seeing my helplessness, he asked: could he help
perhaps? Oh, yes, I said eagerly, as I didn't think I could express what was
on my mind in proper Romanian. Now he opened his desk drawer, pulled out a
sheaf of documents, put it down before me, and told me to study it carefully.
Afterward we could talk about it. What lay before me were papers that contained
a detailed account of the history of our secret organization, from its inception
through the leaflet campaign to its inglorious end-our arrest. Nothing seemed
to be missing; still, leafing through it brought me no relief. The only time
I perked up was when I came across my name, which was rather often. At the
end of the report, which reflected the state of affairs at the time of its
composition, it was noted that I was a fugitive, hiding somewhere in the Radna
Mountains. In the line below, the exact location of my hiding place was given,
as well as orders that a special unit find me and deliver me to the police.
Well, that had already been done. All in all, it was a thorough, well-put-together
piece of work, and everything in it was absolutely true. By the time I got
to the end of the narrative, I had begun to understand Romanian.
But how, from whom, could they extract such a detailed confession?
What happened was that one of our friends, who had at his disposal every
piece of evidence connected to the work of our organisation and complete knowledge
of every facet of its operation, made a full, sweeping confession a few hours
after his capture, revealing everything, but everything he knew. Like a man
suffering from a dangerous distension, he relieved himself, just let it all
out. After that, the questioning of the others was a mere formality, a confirmation
of the detailed confession already in hand. Now we may ponder how this kind
of full disclosure can be reconciled with the image of the ideal hero, the
courageous resistance fighter; and we may also reflect on the ethical ramifications
of such a compliant self-revelation. But the fact is that the boy not only
made the investigators' job much easier, but he also helped his friends in
a way. It's true that anyone among us who longed to be tortured, to have bones
broken, so that he could fulfil the fate of the heroic resister, may have
been terribly annoyed, if only because his plans were thwarted, the drama
was scrapped. But keeping in mind our physical and mental condition, I hate
to think what would have happened if any of us had resisted. In any event,
a stubborn denial of facts, of what were after all punishable offenses, would
have made no sense at all. Without prior consultation, we couldn't possibly
have counted on all eighteen of us to reveal, or keep silent about, the same
details. Still and all, I believe the confession was a little more detailed
than necessary.
Do you now know who this talkative fellow was?
Sure; that became obvious soon enough. We couldn't very well respect him
for it, and in the beginning, it caused tension between us, but then we eased
up on him. It was a touchy moment when we did, dramatic even, not without
tragic overtones. On the one hand, we knew that basically he did the right
thing; thanks to his confession, we got off without a serious beating. For
this reason alone, we didn't make him feel the brunt of our anger. But we
no longer considered him our friend. Let's face it: his conduct, from a moral
standpoint, was seriously flawed. For one thing, he divulged details about
events and incidents for which no physical evidence existed, and which therefore
were not present in our collective memory. They were things only he and one
or two others knew about, and he could have counted on them to remain silent.
But because he blabbed so volubly, a few people who were completely innocent
also ended up in prison, including our beloved literature teacher.
Once, on a school outing, we were collecting acorns in the woods. Our teacher
led the expedition. During a lull in the activities, he sat down to rest under
a tree. After a brief deliberation, two of us approached him and tried to
engage him in conversation. "The situation is critical," we said, "something
must be done. We've already started an organisation. Could you give us a few
words of advice?" Without hesitation but sounding quite concerned, he told
us to get the idea of forming a secret organisation out of our heads and the
sooner the better. We wouldn't get anywhere with it, and would only cause
pain and suffering to ourselves and our families. At the moment, this was
not the way to demonstrate courage. For his wise counsel, our teacher was
sentenced to a year and a half in prison.
How would you describe the atmosphere of that first long interrogation?
Well, it wasn't exactly a cozy tea party, but I didn't feel I was in the
hands of a ferocious examiner, who turned hours of relentless questioning
into a bitter experience just for the hell of it, simply because he detested
his victim. In fact, there were moments when I felt warm currents of pity,
compassion, even understanding coming my way from the other side of the desk.
To put it more succinctly, my interrogation took place under completely civilized
conditions.
My well-meaning interrogator, Lieutenant Jusca, selected from the available
material before him the sections relating to me, and he prepared a record
of the hearing. Carefully enunciating his words, he read what he wrote down,
and when necessary, offered brief explanations, referring to relevant clauses
of the criminal code and trying to describe in simple terms the legal expressions
he thought I wouldn't grasp. It was an act of almost unimaginable politeness
by a state security insider toward an enemy of the people. While he was talking,
I, like a good student, kept nodding in agreement.
Now and then, he leaned back in his chair and out of simple curiosity lingered
over a detail, quizzing me informally as though trying to penetrate the world
of childish conspiracies. But he made sure not to include these asides in
the text of my confession. At one point, he asked me to describe a typical
secret meeting. I tried to make him understand in my best Romanian that he'd
better ask somebody else, because I hated all meetings with a passion. If
he really wanted to know, I dozed off during an important consultation. This
happened to be true. To this day, I am overcome with irresistible glumness
and torpor at any sort of meeting or assembly. My eyes get droopy, I feel
I am about to faint, my end is near. During one of our executive sessions,
I did actually doze off, and was severely reprimanded by the executive council,
a body, I should note, of which I was a voting member. However, my knowledge
of Romanian at the time did not make it possible to express myself subtly
enough, so I stuck to the simplest synonym of doze. "You really fell asleep?"
asked Lieutenant Jusca, suddenly looking up. "I'll put that down." I wasn't
going to interfere with the unusual way he was conducting the hearing, but
I was a bit surprised when he included the following: "He did not demonstrate
much interest in the work of the organisation. On one occasion he fell asleep
during an executive meeting."
Unfortunately, the remark, in that precise form, was included in my case file
as well, and therefore made available to my court-appointed attorney, a silly
old man, who quoted it verbatim at the trial. "Honoured Members of the Court,"
he began grandly, "nothing proves more conclusively that children stand before
this high court, who still needed a good night's sleep. This poor child-here
he pointed at me-fell asleep during a meeting he himself organised." Fell
asleep my ass, I muttered; I only dozed off. I was so angry, I almost broke
into tears. That old fuddy-duddy spoiled everything. For once, I could appear
as a heroic freedom fighter before a real Romanian tribunal, and it turns
out that not only was I asleep while decisions were made about the fate of
the nation; I also tried to find excuses for my conduct like a coward. The
old fart came to see me spit on myself. But I felt like spitting on him, too.
For a long time afterward, it seemed that this was the moment when my life
hit rock bottom. My loyal friends tried to console me as we returned to the
station house. To our great joy, we were all put in a common cell; with the
trial behind us, we could freely communicate with one another. The first thing
we did was to go over the details of
the proceedings. Outdoing one another in our performances, we reenacted the
highlights, imitating the main players in the courtroom drama. We also held
a quick trial of our own. Our court rendered summary justice: the prosecutor,
the presiding judge, and the two lay judges were sentenced to fifteen years
each. I moved to have my lawyer debarred and his license revoked forever.
As for Lieutenant Jusca, he carried out his assignment with patience and understanding.
At the end of the hearing, he had me read and sign the official record he
prepared. "How many years do you think I will get?" I asked him modestly.
"Five," he said firmly. "But you might get away with three." That's just what
happened. First I was sentenced to five years, on appeal it was reduced to
three, of which I served a little over two-honourably and in good health.
Translated by Ivan Sanders